Sunday, April 5th 2009

Ok. This morning, had an orange, 70 calories but then I had two bowls of popcorn. I sure didn't feel to good after and it got rejected. The orange stayed in though. Then my brother went to work with my dad, it makes me so made how that 18 year old child dose not do anything! Ugh, Doesn't clean, work, help pay for things. Ugh. But when things get rejected, I sure get tired, faintish, and just not to good. I sure have fainted from it happening though. Speaking of fainting, when I weighted my lowest, I was going up to bed and the last two steps I just fell. Luckily, it was forward. My dad found me and started yelling at me. It was sort of a funny situation. That just popped into my head when I said fainting. But I do feel better with less in me and its addicting when it happens. I sure have even ripped me throat. I faint easy though, when I see needles, blood, the thought of just anything like that I can just faint. When I was in high school, Science class sure did not go to well. Haha. My heart races sometimes, and I know its from that.

Anyways! I was looking to be moving to B.C. Ive always wanted to live there. My dream as a child was to have a blue house in the mountains, with a white fence, a garden, and lived off fruit I grew. Well I was there not to long ago for the first time, and there is so many fruit stands!! My plan wouldn't work. Although, I still want to move there and there are other things I can do. So I'm going to keep on saving and keep on looking out for work. I would be so happy.

I sure did go to the gym today! I just need to go everyday for at least two hours or I feel very angry the next day and I need to burn my calories. So I did 20 minutes on this fun "gilding machine" Its pretty much just like skiing. 306 calories on there. Then I did my weights for 30 minutes. Then I went on the elliptical for 45 minutes burning 804 calories. Then I went on the treadmill and burnt another 200 calories. That was just nothing though. I totally was reading while doing my inclidedness on there. I was reading about toning up and the boot camp workout in this.. I think it was Self magazine. Anyways! They said to loose 2 pounds a week you should burn 500 calories, 1 pound a week, 250 calories. See how much Ive messed my body up! Anything I eat just clings on me, since it thinks its starving. I did gain weight when I went to B.C because I was with the most loveliest boy ever! I totally have a crush on him. He's so sweet, and isn't fake what so ever. Likes pretty much what I like, and I had to eat with him. I ate things with him that I haven't eaten for almost 4 years. Was it worth it? Not the food I ate, I didn't enjoy it that much! I would have probably not even had it, but being with him and sharing that.. It was! <3 We will save him for another time.

So I went to Safeway after the gym, was going to do the chicken thing, or even a stir-fry. But I just cant come to do it. I will even make food for myself intending to even eat it, but I will just throw it out. So what did I have for my dinner?! Green beans! I love green beans. No carbs, no fat, no sugar, and it doesn't even have any 'natural sugar' since its a vegetable. Calories intake for it.. 10 calories for half a cup! By the time you drain the juice it is like a half. So I make two cans. So 30 calories the most! Then I put garlic and my no calorie spray butter on it. Just going to do some cleaning later on tonight, so I will be burning some more calories, and if I do intake anything else, it will be popcorn or an orange.